Travel Planning for Couples Who've Almost Killed Each Other on Holiday

Travel is supposed to be romantic. New places, shared adventures, escaping the routines of daily life. Just the two of you, exploring the world together.

In reality, travel also involves flight delays, lost luggage, wrong turns, exhaustion, hunger, and spending more time together than you normally do while navigating unfamiliar situations. It's a pressure cooker. And if you've ever had a genuine argument about which way to walk in a foreign city, you know that even the best relationships get tested on the road.

Here's how to plan and travel in ways that minimise the conflict and maximise the actual enjoyment.

The planning phase

Many travel fights happen before you even leave. Disagreements about where to go, how much to spend, what kind of trip you want.

Have the budget conversation first. Before you start dreaming about destinations, know what you can actually spend. Agree on a number you're both comfortable with.

Talk about what kind of trip you each want. Some people want to relax; others want to explore. Some want a packed itinerary; others want to wander. If one of you is imagining a beach resort and the other is imagining a hiking expedition, you need to discover that before you book.

Compromise where needed. Maybe you do her kind of trip this time and his kind next time. Maybe you split the trip. Maybe you build in solo time.

Plan together. Even if one person is the natural planner, involve the other in decisions. Share the research, share the decisions, share the responsibility.

On the ground

The trip itself brings new challenges. You're out of your normal routines, dealing with unfamiliar logistics, and spending a lot of time together.

Keep the basics handled. Most travel fights are actually about hunger, tiredness, or overstimulation. Notice when you or your partner is getting depleted. Stop for food. Go back to the hotel for a rest.

Have a navigation agreement. Getting lost is stressful. Decide who's navigating—or agree to use a GPS and follow it together—and stick with the system.

Build in flexibility. If every hour is scheduled, every delay becomes a crisis. Leave space for things to take longer than expected.

Schedule some solo time. Even on a couple's trip, you don't have to do everything together. Building in independent time reduces friction.

Have a conflict protocol. Agree in advance: if we're fighting about something dumb, we stop, take a break, get food or rest, and come back to it.

The specific flashpoints

Airports. Travel days are high-friction; treat each other gently.

Money. Who's paying for what? Have a system and apply it consistently.

Pace. Some people want to maximise every moment; others want to move slowly. Find a middle ground.

Photos. One partner wants to document everything; the other finds the constant photography annoying. Negotiate.

Coming home

Build in buffer time—a day before you return to work if possible. You'll be tired, facing laundry and emails.

Debrief the trip together. What worked? What didn't? What do we want to do differently next time?

And celebrate the trip. Look at the photos. Reminisce about the highlights. Let the frustrations fade and the good memories crystallise.

Travel can be hard on relationships, but it also creates something you can't get at home. Shared experiences in new places. Memories that only the two of you have. Proof that you can navigate the unfamiliar together.

That's worth the occasional argument about which way to walk.